There I was, on a treadmill at the gym, the big screen in front of me tuned to CNN, informing all who dared watch that the federal government had been hacked, probably by China. That the nasty Chinese had hacked a database, stealing information on federal workers. Well, they weren’t exactly sure it was China. I mean, they couldn’t prove China was responsible, but the experts CNN rolled out onto their stage for instant analysis thought it could have been the Chinese. That it probably was the Chinese. One thought it was “likely” the Chinese were to blame and that was that. The Chinese, were now the “likely” hackers of the federal government. From there it was a short hop to officially fixing blame, facts be damned.
I was just getting over the implications of CNN’s speculation that the United States Government had (likely) been hacked by Communist China (probably) and what we might have to do about it at a time when Congress (coincidentally) is voting to limit spying by the NSA, when they hit me with more alarming news. ISIS, the all-encompassing evil ISIS, had turned off the water at some dam somewhere in the desert and Iraqis were running for their lives. Again. Oh no! But why do we care?
Because more trouble in Iraq, is sure to lead to another round of expert advice from former military personnel now consulting for CNN, advising us that the problem will only be solved by more American “boots on the ground.” Even with the massive sectarian religious overtones driving the fight, even though we have been ineffective in our efforts over more than a dozen years in Iraq (25 years if you take it all the way back to the beginning with “Desert Shield”), only more “boots on the ground” will fix things in the Middle East and North Africa. Only more funding for the military-industrial complex will help. The only way to extricate ourselves is to dig a deeper hole. What would you expect ex-military personnel to say? Their training, their very fiber, is tuned to achieving victory not withdrawal, which they surely associate with defeat.
Never is there any mention of what can be done to achieve peace. Just more war and spending more for war. It’s what we do. And the media, gone mad in the rush for ratings, is all in. You don’t think so?
From there it only got worse, with a story about a 26 year-old in Boston who was shot dead by police because he had a knife and was suspected of harboring thoughts of killing police. CNN had a terrible picture of the young man wearing a baseball cap on backwards, down low over his forehead, youth rapper-culture fashion, making him look like something less than a member of the local high school debate team.
They kept flashing the photo over and over as they talked about the way ISIS is brainwashing American youth to do their bidding on U.S. soil. The connection was obvious, as the young suspect’s family is “well known among Muslims” in the Boston community. There it is. Not too difficult for the tv people to figure it out. THEY ARE EXPORTING TERROR!
ISIS is here! ISIS is there! ISIS is everywhere, cutting off the water and brainwashing our youth while, at the same time, evil Chinese Communists (our business partners to whom we are deeply in debt) hack our sacred national database, stealing information about federal employees! Although no one is exactly certain why.
If you want any peace of mind at all, avoid CNN. Especially when you go to the gym. It’ll blow your workout all to pieces.